Friday, December 31, 2010

Pushed to the Edge

Just when I thought my stress levels would start evening out a bit after the holidays - guess what? Surprise, surprise - they haven't. If anything I may have hit a new high on the old stress scale. What with our current kitchen reno situation and - gasp! not having a dishwasher for like 3 weeks now - things (my patience, namely) have been quickly falling to the wayside.

We've been holed up in our (yikes! unfinished) basement until the renos are complete, speaking of which, seem to be taking waaay longer than anticipated. But I did anticipate this, actually. These projects always take twice as long as you originally plan. Especially when your husband insists on doing all the work himself.

I'm trying hard to keep my mouth shut until things go really wrong. Should it come down to it -  I have Mike Holmes on speed dial, but for now, I'm zipping it. Hubs has been getting enough hassle from my mother-in-law, who insists on telling him her dreams of beams falling down and killing him instantly. At least I'm not that neurotic.

Also, being off on "vacation" this week with a very bossy, constantly-needing-to-be-entertained 4.5 year old, hasn't helped matters. Its bad enough I feel as if I've been abducted and forced to live in someone's creepy basement (without having "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" playing repeatedly on a dusty old tube television and a kid yelling "Draw a skeleton, mouse, snail, insert random animal or object here picture, Mommy!").

After a few days of this, I've lost whatever reason I may have started out with. Like yesterday for example. In a desperate attempt to flee from the hammering, drilling & welding sparks seen flying from my home, I grabbed Ciaran and dragged him to the nearest mall, which happens to be the size of an entire city block. Not exactly clear thinking on my part. True, it wasn't boxing day, but in these parts "boxing week" gives half the city the idea to mill about aimlessly, looking for so-called bargains.

Normally, I wouldn't have braved that crowd, but my dear, delusional hubby, obviously blinded by his love for me, purchased a beautiful sweater gift for a size 4!! I am definitely not a size 4 - to be honest, I don't think I ever have been.

To make a long story short, we didn't return the sweater. There was a huge lineup and I don't do well with lineups - especially with a kid in tow. But we did end up taking this beauty home:

Ciaran enjoying his latest toy catch!
There was no logical reason for me to buy this for my son. He'd just gotten a sh!tload of toys for Christmas only days before. Strangers walking by the lineup to pay were looking at me like I'd lost my mind. The thing is bigger than he is.

I suppose I had gone a little insane - at least temporarily. I was tired and sweaty and I really needed the whining to stop. Also, I felt guilty because earlier that day he wouldn't get in his car seat and I said something to the effect that if he didn't I'd beat his ass. Oh, I didn't mean it. I never even usually talk like that, but I had that anxious, over-whelmed feeling I get when I'm being pushed to my limit.

A woman getting out of her car next to us gave me a really dirty look after hearing me. But she had the privilege of going shopping with her male friend without any kids tagging along. I'm sure I've given that same look to frazzled mothers back in my know-it-all pre-child days. So I didn't take it all that personally. One day she'll understand. And maybe even end up lugging a giant fish pillow home with her.

Anyway, Ciaran thinks it's pretty cool that I bought him a giant catfish at the mall. And I decided I'm not going to live my life with regrets anymore. Besides, it kind of goes with the psycho / abductor decor we have going on right now.


Deborah said...

I went to the mall myself yesterday (Macy's clearance - whoooo hoo!) and I was SHOCKED how busy. People! Stay home when I want to shop! Heh

I have remodeled a time or four in my lifetime (once with little ones like yourself) and usually by the end I'm crying and eating chocolate chips out of the freezer.

That just may become your son's favorite toy yes?

Kimberly said...

Oh my whiskered catfish.
Home renos suck just as hard as the overalls that Mike wears sans sleeved shirt. Dude oozes trailer trash and sawdust.
If it makes you feel better my microwave died yesterday. Now I actually have to cook shit the old fashioned way.
Just think 2011is around the beginnings :)

Sandra said...

No home is complete without a giant catfish! Good for you for the regrets thing. Regrets are highly over-rated, and when you're 80, you don't remember what you were supposed to regret.
Sorry about your living situation. Just think, it could be worse: you could be Harry Potter living out in a tent in the middle of nowhere in the middle of winter (did you see the movie? If not, this last sentence is lost on you!)
Take care! And hey, add me to your twitter, I'd love to chat with you sometime: @AbsoNarcissism!

Mrs. Tuna said...

Shoot I can't even commit to painting a room let alone redecorating. You're a braver woman than I.

Anonymous said...

I'm with you on the mall madness. Had to go yesterday to buy reciprocating (unexpected) gifts from the neighbors. It was hell. And with 3 little ones in tow? Even worse.

You got off easu just buying a catfish.

Here's to a New Year with no regrets!

Anonymous said...

lol Damn! That is a huge fish!

I always tell my kids Im gonna beat them. People dont even look at me funny anymore.

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

Huge fish make for happy children.
I shared my home with a 4 foot long Orca for years, which is technically a mammal, but still.
Crowded malls really are less stressful than husbands doing home improvement too!
Happy New Year!

ModernMom said...

Ohhh hon I think you have had reason to be stressed!! It is always darkest before the dawn and all that:)

The Empress said... Jon BOn Jovi says, "its' my life..."

You and he deserve it.

Anonymous said...

I don't know if its the threatening of an ass beating or the giant catfish but you are awesome.

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